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An army Major visits the sick soldiers, goes up to one private and asks, "What’s your problem, Soldier?" "Chronic syphilis, Sir!" "What treatment are you getting?" "Five minutes with the wire brush each day, Sir!" "What’s your ambition?" "To get back to the front lines, Sir!" "Goodman!" says the Major.

He goes to the next bed. What’s your problem, Soldier?" "Chronic piles, Sir” "What treatment are you getting?" "Five minutes with the wire brush each day, Sir!" "What's your ambition?""To get back to the front lines, Sir!" "Goodman!"says the Major.

 He goes to the next bed. What’s your problem, Soldier?" "Chronic gum disease, Sir!" "What treatment are you getting?" "Five minutes with the wire brush each day, Sir!" "What’s your ambition?""To get to the front of the line and get the wire brush before the other two, Sir!"